June 29, 2009

Totally hooked, gotta go read..

I am so excited I can hardly contain myself. My Southern Vampire Mystery books came in the mail last week and I am totally hooked. I haven't been able to put the first book down. It is heavenly.

Complete opposite to Twilight, I must say because I was literally forcing myself to read that book, but I am entranced by this story. And totally in love with the vampire Bill, he is intoxicating.

I am buying the tv series Trueblood this week when it comes out, but I want to finish the first book, which is the first series before I watch it. I want to really get to know the characters in the book before seeing them on the screen.

And I must say, this story is sultry, sexy and the way the vampire and Sookie, the main female character, are flirting, I would say there is going to be fireworks some time soon! It is SO good that the part I just read, will have to be reread again later because the kids were wrestling on the bed next to me and I couldn't take it all in. It's THAT good. Gotta go read, gotta go read......

Bad cinema experience

My friends will tell you how particular, pedantic and slightly obsessive compulsive I am about my cinema experience. You see, one of my favourite things to do is go and watch a movie on the big screen. I love it.

And I love our blockbuster season when all the big gun movies come out.

So I was slightly annoyed and mildly irritated that this evenings cinema experience has been a bit of a let down. I will explain.

I have been waiting to see the new Transformers movie and planned to see it tonight at 6.30pm. I rang the cinema around 4pm to confirm the time, only to be told it had been sold out. Big letdown number 1. The only other movie that interested me was The Proposal, so I decided to see that.

The cinema had about 10 other people in, so I took my usual seat, which is in the middle, two seats in from the right. I like that seat. I spread all my gear out, like I always do, my softdrink on one side and my water on the other. My bag on the seat next to me and my coat on the other. See, I am OCD about this, and my friends know it, but damnit, that's the way I like it.

So bugger me if a couple doesn't come in and sit DIRECTLY behind me. And start opening their crinkly, crackly bags of food right in my ear. When there are 50 other seats vacant. Big letdown number 2. I thought about moving across the isle, but I like this seat. So I put up with it.

Big letdown number 3 was when this big loud grinding sound started coming from the screen, it seemed, so much so that I could hardly hear what the actors were saying. This went on for about 1 hour, and as the movie wasn't really my cup of tea, I just let it go. Then the lights came on, the movie stopped and we sat there like stunned birds in the light.

The movie came back on, sans noise and it was uneventful til the finish. I felt really ripped off, paying $14.00 for a crap movie, one that I couldn't hear and with interuptions, so I marched up to the counter to ask for a refund or a free ticket because for $14.00 I expect a bit better service. And I can be a bitch about things like this.

At this time the next viewing of Transformers was just about to start, so every teenager from a 20 km radius was here, so the assistant asked me to wait by the other counter til he was free. One assistant for the busiest time of the night. Where's the rest of the friggin staff?

I waited for 10 minutes then left as it would be another half an hour before he would be free. And who knows if I would even get a refund. So I drove home, feeling ripped off, unsatisfied and annoyed that my cinema experience was crap.

June 28, 2009

Go Roosters!

I have been trying for days to get my blog button code right, so you guys can copy the code and add my button to your page. Cmon help me out because I have lost blood, sweat and tears trying to get it right with help from several html gurus who I totally admire. Because I suck at html and it gives me a headache.

BUT it looks like it has worked so give me some love and add my button..

Gotta say how proud I am of my son. His under 7's football team is still undefeated and today my crazy football obsessed offspring got his 4th try, numerous try saving tackles AS WELL AS man of the match. The Hubbster and I think this was his best game in his 2 years of playing, he was just on fire. He ran through the pack of defenders and pushed his way to get the ball over the line for his try, a fact that he reminded us of all day.

After the game, I took him to Cold Rock and had icecream as a treat, and used up his award voucher from the game. It was so nice just the two of us having "a date" as he likes to call it. But I think I have figured out why he played so good, because when I went to tuck his shirt into his shorts, I realised he had no undies on! So that's his secret, no underwear = awesome game!!!

Here's my handsome man, right in the middle with his blue headgear on!


June 27, 2009

A day to remember

It has been a strange day today. Good and not so good things have happened so I want to address my day in point form, because it's easier to digest.

- we woke up late and subsequently were nearly late for school, but as this is the last day of school before holidays, I don't particularly care.

- bought some groceries and threw them in the car on the way to the doctor to check on Miss T's atrocious cough.

- waited at the doctors for ONE HOUR before we went in. What the hell is the point of making an appointment when you never get in on time? I mean, how do they fall so far behind FIRST THING IN THE MORNING.

- saw 7 kangaroos in the paddock. What a treat!

- visited our draftsman about our plans, ready for a fight and hoo haa they are nearly finished and we are to collect them on Wednesday! With our account! That we probably won't want to look at, but who cares, if our house plans are in my hot little hands I will dance a samba. Then the serious stuff will start...

- home for lunch, dvd and lie down (me) then back to school, grabbed kids, deposited two kids at Poppys while I took Miss D to Jazz. Open week this week so I stayed and watched. Great stuff Miss D, you rock!

- collected the kids from Poppys and drove home. On the outskirts of town, the temperature in our four wheel drive skyrocketed so I stopped in the dark and the rain. With 3 tired, hungry and irritable kids. The hubbster was at work, so we rang Nanny who came out, we drove her back into town and then drove BACK home in her car, arriving after 7pm.

Even though we live in our shed, I was so glad to get home. And guzzle a wine...

- got to bed around 10pm, and woke around 3am with sharp stomach pains and a need to get to the bathroom. Through the rain (as the bathroom is about 10 steps from the shed) I ran in and threw up the contents of my chicken dinner. Just to remind me that I left the groceries in the car, while we waited to see the doctor. Big Mistake. Food poisoning is so overrated.

- got back to bed and Miss D started her nightly coughing, so I was back up getting medicine for her, hoping like hell the other two kids didn't wake up.

It was a day of mixed blessings, as Miss T didn't need any hard stuff for her cough, and I just need to explain to anyone waiting in line at the supermarket who cringe when she coughs that "no she doesn't have swine flu, so you don't need to move away, she just has a cough".

And I must say that the hunky doctor is still hunky and not once did I imagine what he would look like soaking wet emerging from a pool, with his hair slicked back. Nope. Not once....

June 24, 2009

Writers Workshop

Today, while sitting on the floor playing dollies and cups of tea with Miss T, I thought it was the perfect opportunity to do prompt number 1 in this weeks Writers Workshop, courtesy of Mama Kat.

1.) Interview a child. To fully appreciate this interview you need to know a few things about Miss T. She is 4 years old, she has a great imagination, and an imaginary friend called Derek (thanks alot Barbie movies) she still has some trouble with certain pronunciations eg instead of saying frog, friend and funny, she says sog, send and sunny (and sucking hell instead of fucking hell). Don't get me started on that one.

She also says wuge and wappy instead of huge and happy. And wude and weally instead of rude and really. And I just love this about her. I will write as she speaks, so you may need to translate.

Me: hey you have a scratch on your hand

Miss T: yep, I did it on the concwete bwock

Me: how did that happen?

Miss T: Dewick pushed me

Me: why did he push you?

Miss T: cos he was being meanie to me

Miss T: but I went to the hostibul and the doctor fixed it for me

Me: well that's good. Did you cry?

Miss T: no, yes I cwied a bit, but you can't cwy because the doctor will put you in the dungeon

Me: why would he put you in the dungeon?

Miss T: if you cwy he will. We don't have a dungeon but

Me: where did you see a dungeon?

Miss T: umm, on Spy Kids, or maybe Sharkboy and Wavagirl

Miss T: Dewick went to the dungeon, but Dewick is there now

Me: where?

Miss T: (pointing across the room) there he is

Me: (actually looking for Derek) Oh, what's he doing?

Miss T: he's having a cuppa tea. But he's not doing baway (ballet)

Me: why isn't he doing ballet?

Miss T: cos boys don't do baway

Me: there was a boy at ballet yesterday

Miss T: (thinking) oh yeah, there was a boy there

Miss T: but he didn't have a dwess on

Me: no, but boys can do ballet as well as girls. What else do boys like?

Miss T: boys like football.

And on and on it went. I love my daughter to bits....

Don't be in such a hurry to grow up

While collecting the kids from school today, I noticed something different about my son. He had a purple love heart drawn on his face. On his cutey pie cheek actually. This needed further investigating.

When I asked Mr C about it, he went all sheepish and blushed and grinned and said "oh, Shalom did it." Then he went on:


"oh mum, she is so funny, she is the funniest in the class. She does funny things all the time". All the while grinning and looking somewhat wistful in the distance.

"Oh really" I say, trying not to embarrass him, not unlike his two sisters who start chanting "Mr C and Shalom, kissing in the lane, K I S S I N G...

This little girl is actually gorgeous. She is funny and friendly and has the cutest chubby cheeks you just want to pinch!

This has got me thinking about how early crushes begin? My older two are 6 and 8 and they both talk about other kids in their class who they "like" and who they chase and who chase them back. Wow 6 years old and chasing girls, it's kinda scary because I didn't have my first boyfriend til I was in Year 7, which made me 13.

He was "my first kiss" behind the big garbage bins in E Block after school. There were 3 couples all at it and we missed the bus home. I didn't lose my virginity til I was 17, so maybe I was a late bloomer.

I know when young kids say they "like" someone it's all fun and innocence, but I am aware that kids are more knowledgeable and in tune with things at an earlier age these days. And that is scary.

My 8 year old daughter is wanting to wear midriff tops and tight jeans and is very aware of what she looks like. I only shudder to think what it will be like when she is a new teenager. She asks me questions about different things, and I am honest with her. At her age, I didn't have a clue.

Is society putting these ideas into these little minds, giving them too much information too soon? Or is it television, movies and media in general? I hope to keep my kids free from this pressure to grow up, for as long as I can. I want to let them have their innocence and sweet beliefs before they learn how hard it actually is growing up.

June 23, 2009

I'm a Mother, I can bribe.

I had a win of sorts today. I relied heavily on threats and bribes but in the end it was just what I had to do.

This week at Miss D's ballet and jazz, it is open week, where the parents are allowed to watch. This is an important week because it's the only time I get to see what she is actually doing, and it is also a mock exam, because she has her first ballet exam after the school holidays.

So I really wanted to go. Of course, The Hubbster was working and the grandparents were out of town, so I had no choice but to take along Mr C and Miss T, remembering their ages as being a sometimes noisy and energetic 6 and an always loud and crazy 4.

I collected Miss T from Kindy and the first thing her teacher said was, something along the lines of "well, she is bouncing off the walls today, she is all over the place, she is a lunatic". Or something similiar, making me think there is no way in hell she will sit quietly through one hour of "watching" ballet. It just ain't gonna happen.

But I REALLY wanted to see my big girl doing her "thang" so during the drive into town, I bribed, I threatened and I pleaded with them just to be good and behave during the dance class and they could have their choice of whatever treat they wanted at the shop on the way home.

Well, we got through the hour! It helped that there was another mum there with two kids aged 2 and 5, so I was out in front from the beginning. My boy was fabulous, sitting with me the entire time and I was so proud of him. I would give him an 8.5 out of ten, because he was very tempted to get on the floor with Miss T who had started to roll around about half way into the class. I would give her about a 6 out of ten, because she was pretty good. She just got bored towards the end and kind of joined in, which didn't impress the teacher, but that's just the way it is sometimes.

The only one who got into trouble was me, because I haven't put the ribbons on the ballet shoes yet. Me bad. And I let the kids eat their chocolates in the car on the way home, right before dinner, because I really think they deserved their treat!

Still in the shed

Since, I am over the 100 post mark now, I thought it about time to review why I am actually here, and as one reader asked "show us your shed"! So I refer back to my very first post that explains what the hell I am doing living in something which mostly equates to a bad neverending camping trip.

Farmers Wife: In the beginning ... Come suffer with me.

June 22, 2009

I'm a Whore

That got your attention didn't it!! Yes I am a comment whore, courtesy of my mate over at My Kids Might Be Martians. Apparently I stalk her blog but damn it, I like it. She is interesting and fun, and I am happy to grab the crown. Here it is:- and I might just put it under my awards because it kind of is an award, possibly the stalking award. Now, there's an idea..


June 20, 2009

The Best Day Ever

We literally had the best day ever today. Mr C (aged 6) played football, and his team remained undefeated winning this game 9 - 0. It wouldn't worry me if they didnt' win a game, because I just love the fact they are playing a team sport, having fun and the parents get to cheer for them.

But it is amazing that they keep on winning, despite the fact the little terrors play up at training, sending the coach into a near frenzy. But they get it all together for the game, and no one can understand how?

My football mad son also got his third try and I am so proud of him. And he is proud of himself too! After the game, we collected the kids nanna and drove out to the Mount Larcom show, which is an agricultural show held every year. As well as the usual sideshow alley and rides for the kids, there are woodchopping, chainsaw and horseriding events.

The kids loved the baby animal nursery where they could cuddle different animals. Of course I forgot to take my camera along, so I have no photos of today. I suck big time.

The first things we saw were the cattle. Lots and lots of cows and bulls, some as pretty as a picture as they were being judged.We have decided to breed cattle on our land, so are investigating what breeds to go with. There are two that interest us, so we wanted to have a look while at the show. It is very exciting to think we may become legitimate farmers very soon!

It was a good thing nanna was on board because the kids wanted showbags and she bought them at a ridiculous price, but that's what nannas are for. The show bags (which are The Fairies, Ben 10 and Stuff for the Tween Set) are filled with heaps of plastic crap that will either be broken tommorrow or thrown out, or possibly on the floor of the car with all the other junk.

Which makes me think of what would be in a show bag for me, as a frazzled mother. So The Frazzled Mothers Showbag consists of:-

- a bottle of wine and a plastic cup for the ride home after the show because I am tired, stressed and worn out from looking at cows all day

- various gift vouchers for the movies, the spa to get a nice massage, some babysitting, the wine shop, my favourite restaurant, the list goes on

- some nice bling in the form of a ring, a bracelet or some earings (not expected in a $25.00 showbag)

- a magazine subscription to my favourite read

- a couple of instant dinners for those times when I just don't feel like cooking...

- some very expensive and smooth inported chocolate, possibly Lindt

- a time out pass for when it all gets too much

- some furry handcuffs just in case the hubby feels like some loving that night

I didn't see this particular showbag on display so I guess I miss out this year.

It really is a fun day, we go every year, spend heaps of money and enjoy being a family. And the best thing was the kids all behaved and we didn't have one tantrum. Not even from me!!

June 19, 2009

Bling for my blog!

I would like to introduce you to my brand new blog. Courtesy of Brandy over at Stitchblade Designs.

I was going to go all hilarious and witty, but decided on a bit more style and grace. Brandy was fantastic, I only gave her a couple of ideas that I was thinking of and I left it up to her. She came up with this fabulous blog header and I loved it right away. She is so creative and clever, I couldn't be happier. Thanks a bunch Brandy!

My 100th Post!

As is tradition, when one reaches the magical 100th post, it is appropriate to post 100 things about oneself, to the amusement of others. Enough of the posh chatter, here it is. Bouquets of flowers and high fives are expected and appreciated.

1 I love my hometown.

2 I stress really easily.

3 When I was a child, I had encephalitis and nearly died.

4 I spend way too much time at the computer.

5 My favourite colour is green.

6 I would love to be famous.

7 Not for being Paris Hilton, but for something important.

8 Like being a rockstar. Or a famous writer.

9 I always wanted to be a writer.

10 I should have written Twilight.

11 I'm really trying to get into this story.

12 My children make me cry, alot.

13 Because I love them so much.

14 I once caught part of the torn shirt that Doc Neeson from The Angels threw into the crowd.

15 I still have it.

16 Mexician food is my favourite.

17 I don't know why clowns freak me out.

18 Ditto with turkeys.

19 I love watching movies.

20 From Dusk til Dawn is my favourite.

21 I hate the morning school rush.

22 I love coke zero too much.

23 I really love malibu rum way too much.

24 I hate the princess set.

25 Especially if they have blonde hair.

26 And wear ridiculously big sunglasses.

27 I love Joop fragrance. The mans joop.

28 I've worn that since visiting America.

29 I love America.

30 I dream of going back someday.

31 I will go back.

32 It annoys me that I don't tan.

33 I raced go karts and actually won a race.

34 I'm still trying to master the guitar.

35 I used to play drums.

36 Badly.

37 I have one tattoo and would love another.

38 I feel sorry for homeless people.

39 I miss my Dad very much.

40 I hate getting older.

41 I love airplanes and airports.

42 I love reading about really tall buildings and bizarre architecture.

43 I am scared of spiders.

44 Being on the farm, I am getting used to them.

45 But I still don't like them.

46 My favourite smells are my children when they were babies.

47 And campfires.

48 And rain.

49 And Joop.

50 I am cheating on this a bit...

51 I hate my little grey hairs on my head. They suck.

52 My skin gets dry during winter.

53 I like my eyes.

54 I need to lose 5 kilos.

55 Before I buy any more jeans.

56 I'm crafty. But I wish I was better.

57 I love that my friends hug me when we catch up.

58 I love Barats and Beretta. They crack me up.

59 I once had a car accident that blacked out half the city. And most of the businesses too.

60 That day will haunt me.

61 I am left handed and have terrible writing.

62 I love my husband.

63 And my family, who live away. I miss them.

64 Astronomy fascinates me.

65 I would love to be an astronaut.

66 Or a travel agent.

67 I adore Christmas time.

68 I start shopping for the kids presents mid year.

69 So usually I have way too much, and have to return tonnes of stuff.

70 I swear way too much.

71 I would love another child.

72 Dark haired, messy haired men are hot.

73 I wish I was a really good cook.

74 Anything vintage I adore.

75 I love my own company. I love going to the movies alone.

76 I went to America by myself.

77 My husband used to call me Tangles, because I had wild curly hair. Yep. I had a perm.

78 The birth of my children was amazing. And I would love to go through it again.

79 Bad customer service irritates me.

80 I love music. Music can take me back to certain events in my life.

81 I really enjoy doing housework (shedwork) with my Ipod.

82 I love the sunset more than the sunrise.

83 I love shooting The Hubbsters Brno 22. Magnum.

84 I could never shoot an animal.

85 Sometimes I live in the past. And I want to go back.

86 I think Antonio Banderas has a great sense of humour, as well as being totally hot.

87 I can't hit the ball in squash. I ALWAYS miss. It's embarassing.

88 I have a mean backhand swing in tennis though.

89 I wish I could sing so I could ace it at karaoke.

90 I am a nightowl. I never go to bed early. I am always tired in the morning.

91 I am very passionate.

92 I did this list a month ago...

93 I believe in the afterlife.

94 I believe in God.

95 I hope God is a woman.

96 Elvis Presley is the most beautiful man that has ever lived.

97 Walking through his house was a very humbling experience.

98 I love my life.

99 I would die for my children.

100 Sometimes I still can't believe I am a mother. Even after 9 years, when one of them calls me "mum", I am still in awe. I am very blessed.

June 18, 2009

Writers Workshop

Time again for Mama Kats writers workshop or brain scramble, or creative writing. I am answering all prompts this week which are:-

1.) Grab your current read. Let the book fall open to a random page and share two "teaser" sentences from that page, somewhere between lines 7 and 12.

"As we left our clothes behind - and any chance of covering ourselves - we sauntered aimlessly through the park with our willies a-wiggling. After walking for ten minutes I noticed a lot of people with their clothes on, looking around I saw that no-one else had their clothes off - we'd walked out of the nude area into a normal part of the park. We were totally surrounded by nice and respectable families walking their dogs."

Brian Thacker - Rule No. 5: No Sex on the Bus (confessions of a tour leader)

2.) What do you aspire to be?

All I have ever wanted to be was a mother. And a wife. A stay at home one at that. I remember the exact moment in my life when I decided this is what I wanted to be. I was in high school, I was 14 years old and it was a sunny day. I was sitting outside during breaktime and I remember thinking "I can't wait to be a mum, stay at home and look after my family".

This moment is still clear as day to me, even after so many years. And here I am, doing just that, a stay at home mum of three. Do I feel fulfilled? Most days I do, but some days I feel like I suck at mothering, especially if I am stressed and I don't make the right decisions.

I am feeling quite unsettled that maybe my time of mothering my little ones is nearly over, they are growing up and things are changing. No more breastfeeding, no more nappies, no more newborn scents. It's not because I want this to change, it's more that I am forced into it because no matter what I do, this elusive 4th and last baby just doesn't seem to be on the horizon. And it breaks my heart to write that.

3.)Share a piece of unsolicited parenting advice...only I'm soliciting it.

Parenting advice, there's alot around. I would say enjoy EVERY moment because the way kids grow it's like, blink and you will miss it. Another thing I like to think about is when kids are acting up, being naughty and causing chaos, remember 1, it's only a stage and they will generally grow out of it and 2, they are not doing it to piss you off, per say, rather they are learning and growing and testing out boundaries. So suck it up and get on with it.

4.)Tell us about your blogline...how long have you been blogging, when did you start, what were/are your goals for your blog, etc.

Currently my blogline is "How to completely change your life without losing your mind" which reflects my current situation which is moving from suburbia to a farm, living in a shed and becoming somewhat feral. I want to document this stressful crazy time, and look back on it with nostalgia. I have been blogging for 4 months. But, stay tuned because I have an exciting new blog theme and tagline on the way which will be fabulous. So come back and check it out. You know you want to....

5.)If you had 5000 dollars to give away or donate to a charity...explain what you would do with it and why.

I would pass on some money to my mum, to treat herself as she doesn't get to do this so often. I would love her to have holiday somewhere and live it up a bit. I would also donate to the Muscular Dystrophy Association, which is a charity I follow. My cousin passed away from this and I support this cause greatly.





My First Award


I am a bit excited because my gorgeous mirror twin Sissy, over at My Kids Might Be Martians has bestowed some awards and I am grabbing mine with both hands and not letting go. Because I need all the help I can get. But I know she wants me to have this friend award because "she gets me". And I get her. She rocks, so go on, have a look and be amazed.

June 17, 2009

Weekly pic

I have decided to rename my Pic of the Day, my Weekly Pic, because I am too slack arse at present to remember to post every Thursday. This way, I can post any time during the week, and I still will be fulfilling my promise of a pic.. every week..... whatever...

Today I present a groovy entry from one of my favourite websites Awkward Family Photos that cracks me up most days.


YEAH BABY

BTW I hope you really enjoy this because I have just burned the crap out of my chicken schnitzel. Guess it's salad for dinner....

House housekeeping

It's time again for some house, housekeeping. Just so I can look back on this blog in 10 years time and laugh at what a jolly time we had living in a shed, on a farm, TRYING to build our house. Yeah right.

1 Went to see the draftsman last week. He is waiting on the house plans that the engineer currently has and who SHOULD be working on them right now. He said to me "Michelle, stop crossing your arms"...

2 Went to see the draftsman today. He is going to see the engineer today as he has something ready. Our plans perhaps. He said to me "Michelle, take your hands off your hips"...

3 Me hoping that he is getting the impression that I am totally pissed off and sick of waiting for my effing house plans. 3 months and still going...

4 Our builder rang yesterday wondering what is going on and where our completed house plans are. How the hell should I know? He also can't understand what the hold up is.

5 We have decided that we will keep visiting the draftsman EVERY week and push and push and keep this ball rolling. My patience is at an all time low..

6 On a brighter note, we had the tractor slashing our tracks all around the property today, for our firewalls. We are burning off very soon as the grass is super long and crazy. We are then buying some cattle. Then I will be a bona fide farmer.

7 I now plan to walk these tracks with my Ipod, trying ever so gingerly not to step on a snake.

June 16, 2009

Stupid winter

I'm feeling a bit off today. I don't think it's PMS time, I must check the calendar about that. I don't really know why I feel like this. Possibly because:-

1 it's cold and windy outside which is making me feel lethargic
2 it's winter. I hate winter because of the above
3 I have a stupid head cold, so I feel a bit ditzy
4 I have heaps of little things to do but don't feel like doing anything
5 It's my child free day and I am pissed off that I feel like this
6 My time management skills suck

S'pose I better get off my arse and do something. Maybe I will make some muffins for the kids. Or sit at the computer all day. Now, there's a thought.....

(Yep. Just checked my calendar and I'm on cycle day 27. I should have known. In celebration of finding out why I am in this shitty mood, I have just eaten three toasted sandwiches for lunch. My hips can thank me later.)

Bahahahahah

What do these things have in common:-

1 a baby
2 a tiger
3 a naked man jumping out of the boot of a car
4 a missing tooth
5 a missing groom
6 sunburn
7 a chicken
8 Mike Tyson
9 some dodgy gambling
10 a stripper with a heart of gold?????????

THIS. Go with a sense of humour and an open mind and you'll be fine.

June 15, 2009

Yeah Twilight, whatever..

What have I done? I shudder at the thought of letting these words pass my lips. Dare I say them? Will courage find me:-

I'm putting Twilight away. *gasp* omfg you say. UNFINISHED.

And in it's place I have ordered these.


Yep. Books 1 - 7 of The Southern Vampire Mysteries. And I am super excited about it. Look, I have really tried to get into the whole Twilight, throw myself off the damn bridge for Edward show, but even after watching the movie again, I just...... don't want to continue reading the first book. And I really think it's because I saw the movie first, and that ruined the book for me.

So I have decided to put Twilight back on my bookshelf (for now) and will get back to it... later. Maybe after the second movie comes out which will again ruin the books for me. *sigh*

But I can't wait to read these new books I have ordered. And I most certainly will not watch the tv series Trueblood, based on the books until I have finished reading them.

The Twilight purests will want to kick my arse and run me out of town, but I don't care. And if I read about another Twilight quiz or a "Are you in love with Edward" thingy on facebook, I will certainly vomit.

Ahhh, I feel such a sense of relief, but at the same time, think, what the hell is wrong with me? I love my vampire stories, so why oh why is Twilight giving me such a freakin headache?


June 14, 2009

Twilight saga continued..

So I rewatched Twilight again last night. Trying to "get into it". I have now decided that:-

1 I liked it better the second time around. Although

2 There was not enough "fang" action for me

3 I'm warming up to Rob Pattinson, who plays Edward. I have decided that for this particular role, he is the pick. He is a bit brooding, his eyes are intense, I love how protective he is of Bella and I can't wait to see what he does in the next movie. But I'm still not "into him". Like I don't want to throw myself off a bridge for him, like countless others would.

4 The actress Kristen Stewart who plays Bella is super annoying and either can't act, or is overacting. Either way, her facial expressions were making me dizzy.

5 I loved the baseball scene.

6 I loved the music throughout the movie.

7 I need to get into these four Twilight books and finish them because I have my eye on The Southern Vampire Mysteries along with the tv series based on the books called Trueblood. I want to read these NOW but made a pact with myself to finish Twilight first. Well Farmerswife, you better get reading.....

June 12, 2009

Winter sucks big time

Well, I'm officially hating winter. And as The Hubbster most lovingly reminded me this morning "suck it up, we only have another two and a half months of this". "This" being living in a open ended shed in the country, a few degrees cooler than where we used to live.

This morning was absolutely freezing. No one wanted to get out of bed. We do have a lovely wood fire but it gets a bit crowded with 5 of us sitting atop it. That's the trouble, you have to sit right next to it, because the heat disappears once you walk to the toilet and sit your butt on the frozen seat.

And don't even get me started about howling winds. That come through the shed. I am really feeling the cold right now. I completely took for granted my lovely warm house with the heating that we timed to come on around 5am each morning and warm up the entire house. We are living the complete opposite to that now. Just say, I am hardening the eff up.

My makeup was frozen in the jar this morning. Which doesn't really help the bags under my eyes. Once the sun comes up, it starts to warm up, but then by around 5pm the coldness creeps in. We went to football tonight, and by 6.30pm I had had enough. Besides not being able to feel my fingers, all three kids had demanded an icy cup and 2 out of 3 were crying because their fingers were too cold and the icy cups were too icy. I was glad to get home and get everyone dressed in their pjs and sit atop the fire.

I bought the girls some slippers come ugg boots today. Here they are:-


And if anyone ever says to me "wow you have a big house" I will say, well I deserve it because I lived in a shed, in the country, in winter, with frozen makeup and a bloody cold toilet seat.

Writers Workshop

Another week, another writers workshop courtesy of Mama Kat . The prompt I have chosen this week is:-

4.) Write a letter. I have decided to write a letter to my Dad, who passed away 16 October 1999.

Dear Dad

Well, it's been nearly 10 years since you left us. Or as you would say, flew the coup. Yes, you always had a way with words. Your sense of humour was the best part of you, the thing that everyone appreciated. It wasn't the only thing, though. You would do anything for anyone, you were the guy who would always help out.

The day you died, is etched in my brain as a bad memory. As soon as mum rang, I rang Cam to come home. I sat on the back steps in the sunshine with my dogs, not knowing exactly what to do next. Life was carrying on around me, people were coming and going from the motel behind our house. I could hear lawn mowers in the distance, people laughing and kids playing. But my world was crashing around me.

It felt like one of the two strings that held my heart together was broken. You and mum. The two most important people in my life. Now you were gone, the very thing that gave me life. I had never experienced anything like this before.

I had spoken to you on the phone two days prior and you were in hospital, resting. You were sick, but this was so unexpected. And what did you say to me: "I'll talk to you over the weekend, if I don't snuff it first". "DAD, don't say that". But that was you, shockingly funny, walking the thin line between good and bad taste.

Going home to your empty house was heartbreaking. Sorting your things made me cry. I wanted to take everything home with me. I needed to have these things to remember. I have your clothes, your favourite football scarf, your letters from your mum, your bikie leather jacket.

And I have the letter you wrote Phillip and I 26 years ago. We found it on the cupboard. I am amazed it was still there after all these years. I treasure it. You wrote about not providing us with alot because you were always working, trying to give us a good life. Well, you did give us a good life. I only have happy memories of growing up, and we had everything we needed. I don't mean material posessions, but love, warmth and comfort, and safety. What more could we ask for. You did good. I am proud of you.

The day after sorting your things, I was so upset, I didn't know where to turn. I drove to the cathedral and sat in the back, and sobbed. I felt peace.

I wonder were you looking down at everyone during your service. Did you get a laugh when we played all your favourite music by The Shadows? You didn't want depressing organ songs, I know that for a fact. And what about the bikies that came out of the woodwork to pay their respects, then left quietly when the service was over. They wore their colours. That still amazes me now.

I remember going home to mums that night, and in the stillness of my room pleaded with you to give me a sign that you were near. A moving curtain, or a light flickering. But there was nothing.

I still do believe you are somewhere, stiring up trouble and telling jokes and annoying the crap out of someone else. I hope to see you again someday. I have the tape of you singing and I play it - only occasionally because it breaks my heart to hear it, but at the same time reminds me of your voice.

I think you would be proud of me. I wish you could have met your grandchildren. They are so beautiful, and every so often your grandson does something and it reminds me of you. I wish you could have visited us here. I wish you had more in your life, you struggled towards the end. At times, life was hard for you. Certain things happened that nearly broke you.

But you had your sense of humour, your positive attitude and your headstrong loyalty to your family and friends that gave you your identity. I hope wherever you are, the beer is cold, the football is on, the sun is shining and you have your pets around.

BTW my St George is on the top of the footy ladder. I just have to rub that one in........

Love Michelle xx


June 11, 2009

Death proof

I wish I could do this.



June 10, 2009

Customer service

The scene is in our local music shop, part of a well known group.

me: excuse me, do you have "The Definitive Series" by The Easybeats?

her: umm who?

me: The Easybeats "The Definitive Series"

her: I don't know who they are

me: (looks at her as if she's from another planet)
me: are you kidding me?

her: I've never heard of them

me: The Easybeats the greatest Australian rock and roll band of the 1960s?

me: you work in a music shop and you have NEVER heard of them?

her: well, they are a long way before my time

me: honey, thats beside the point. You need to get another job.

This was a perfect example of one of my pet hates, sucky customer service. How can someone working in a music shop not know of The Easybeats? Didn't she have any training?

Bad customer service irritates me. I've had my share:-

1) I hate when I walk to the shop counter and the assistant (once she finishes her telephone call) looks up and says "Are you right?" WTF am I standing here for, you fucking moron. I really hate those three words.

2) People trying to sell me faulty products. A sales assistant once tried to sell me a digital camera. With a cracked screen. For full price. He didn't get the sale.

3) Sales assistants who barely look up when asked a question. It's as if I am ruining their already mundane day by asking if they have Dora the Explorer pyjamas in size 6.

Don't get me wrong, there is great customer service too. We have the best newsagent here where I live. Everytime I walk in, the staff make such a fuss over me and my kids that it's a pleasure to go newpaper shopping. They fawn over my daughter, she runs to them to show off her hair and it's all good. And the fish and chip shop is awesome too. Besides making great food, they are always friendly, even on a Friday night when the stress levels peak. That's called being professional. That's great customer service...

This is giving me a headache..

You may have noticed that my blog theme kinda sucks. For two days I have been playing around with different backgrounds, headers and graphics and I still haven't come up with anything awesome.

Do I go for a vibrant background and easy on the eye title? Or do I stick to a white background and a super unreal heading?

Until I find something that takes my fancy, we all will have to put up with this blank canvas, but keep calling back and I will surprise you with something super. I hope..

June 9, 2009

Where's my eggs?

We may have a egg eating snake raiding our chicken coop. We haven't had any eggs for over a week, and we usually get 2 or 3 a day. We think it may be a sneaky python with a big belly coming in and feasting on my scrambled eggs! If we find him we will relocate him elsewhere!

So today The Hubbster went down to the chook house which is down the hill a paddock away. And I yelled to him "feed the chooks while you are there" and he yelled back "I already have". Then I thought, he bloody heard me! Sound carries. So then I thought about our neighbours who also live a couple of paddocks away and I made a mental note to stop yelling. And to absolutely stop saying Fuck! really loudly because sound carries....

June 8, 2009

Twilight - I don't get it..

You are probably aware of the Twilight phenomenon raging across the globe as we speak. Trouble is, I can't get into it. Now don't get me wrong, I love a good horror flick, just ask my friends. Vampires (From Dusk Til Dawn, 30 Days of Night), Zombies (28 Days Later, 28 Weeks later, Day of the Dead) or Werewolves (Dog Soldiers, Ginger Snaps) are what I am into. And it's even better when it's a cold and rainy night and The Hubbster is working night shift. So I have to put myself to bed. I'm strange like that.

So I watched the movie, and it was good. And I am reading the first book. And I am really trying to get into the groove, because I want to fall in love with Edward too. Some of my facebook friends post comments such as:-

- Bite me Edward
- I wish my husband was Edward
- I want to be Bella
- I wish my husband was a Vampire
- I wish I was a Vampire
- Dreaming of my Vampire lover

I think my indifference is coming from these facts:-


1) I can't get into Rob Pattison, who plays Edward. He's just not doing it for me.

Now if Edward was played by Josh Hartnett, who nearly makes me wet my pants, I would be totally hooked. Here he is. He played the lead in 30 Days of Night

And Again.
And in case you missed it.


2) There's not alot of "steam" in the story. Yes, yes I know the whole thing is directed at teenagers, but what about us housewives who like a bit of bodice ripping? I even joined Twilight Moms. I suppose the success of the story could just be the innocence and romance of it all. But I like my vampires with a hint of unbridled passion. I'm strange like that.

See, I'm really trying. So I am going to watch the movie again this week, keep reading the book, and try to connect with Edward. And I'll report back on my progress. Am I the only one that just doesn't get IT??

Wacko Dreams

I dream alot. If I eat spicy foods, my dreams are wacko. I had two last night. The first one was about our guinea fowl. The came back from a daily jaunt with about 200 babies. Yep. They'd been busy.

The second dream had heaps of these in it.

Along with alot of

This is Kevin McKidd. He of Dog Soldiers and most recently Grey's Anatomy. I told you. Wacko.

June 7, 2009

Tough Farmers Wife

So I sit here @ 3.00pm having a wine because I have been to the Boyne Tannum Hookup and spent over $60.00 on the kids for lunch and rides. And they screamed and complained all the way home. That's gratitude considering how much I detest paying for jumping castles.

So two things have happened today to prove that 1) I am a cranky old woman and 2) I stick up for myself.

1) We were driving to said hookup and out of nowhere a guy drove out in front of us without giving way. I slammed on the brakes, tooted the horn, flashed my lights and tailgated this guy to the supermarket. And he was scared. Because I am in a big Defender and I have a bullbar. He parked right out of the way and didn't get out of his car until I did. Then he scampered into the supermarket before I had time to say "buddy, go back to driving school so you can learn some friggin road rules. I have kids in the car, you loser."

2) Miss T (aged 4) had one ticket left for the rides. After careful consideration, she decided on the red and yellow jumping castle, which only had one little boy on it. Without a lie, she had less than 2 minutes jumping when the woman said "okay time's up, everyone off". WTF there wasn't even any kids waiting to go on. So I said "my daughter just started her jump, she didn't have very long". The woman then let her back on for a jump more worthy of $5.00.

I have always been on the meek side when it comes to confrontations. I always think of something smart to say when the moment is over. But now when it comes to my children, or myself for that matter, I'm a bit harder and stick up for what I believe in. The Hubbster just thinks I'm a bitch. He's possibly right...

I'm a friggin Catholic..

So we have had a day of slackness here. The hubbster and Mr C have gone for the day, so it's me and the girls. We wrestled in bed til 9am, did some washing, watched dvds and pretty much nothing else. So what happens? WE GET VISITORS.

When we lived in town, we had this lovely lady who used to call around with religious pamphlets and a new bible quote each time. The problem is, I am catholic, she isn't. She's something else and at first as I am such a nice person (!) I couldn't say no and took the pamphlets and let her read her passage, but never invited her and her minions in.

The hubbster kept saying, tell her you're not interested, but she is so nice and I couldn't say no. So periodically she would call around, hand me the stuff, I would make an excuse about the phone ringing or lunch cooking and the visit would be short. When we moved out of town, guess what? SHE'S FOLLOWED ME HERE. I didn't even give her exact directions but she's bloody found me! And I'm not happy about it.

I thought I could let her down gently by saying "well, we are moving, nice knowing you, take care" but she pushed for where we were going so I was a bit cagey. A month ago, her followers came out, I took the pamphlets, cut it short and sent them on their way. So back to today. Our day of slackness. Here I am, I hadn't showered as yet, still wearing the same tshirt sans bra that I slept in. And they rock up! And our toasted sandwiches were ready.

This was my chance. She went to hand me the pamphlets and I said:-

"look, I appreciate you coming out, but I am a catholic and am moving back towards that right now. I don't want to waste your time, so don't worry about dropping any more pamphlets out". Did she get the hint? I think she was a bit pissed off, but she read me a bible passage (what the fuck did I just say?) and asked if I minded if she called past once in a while to say "HI". And also that there are workshops I can do to figure out my religious intentions. And I should have said:-

"don't come back. I am not interested. I have never been interested. It's just that you are such a nice lady, I couldn't hurt your feelings. I'm friggin Catholic." but instead I said:-

"yeah, that's fine". Fuck. I really hope she has the hint now and doesn't come back, because I don't want to be blunt and insult her. Remember she is so nice and I totally appreciate that each has their own religion, and this has blown way out of proportion because I didn't say no in the first place.

June 5, 2009

What is she trying to tell me..

Mum sent me this birthday card.

And the writing in the middle said: 20 Bottles of Wine!! Have a fun day.

Is my funny mother trying to tell me I'm getting older or that I'm drinking too much?????


Writer's Workshop

I am participating in Mama Kats Writer's Workshop. This lovely lady provides the prompts to which I choose one or however many to answer in a fun, witty or sombre way.

Directions:For you newbies it's never to late to jump in!! Here is what you must do. Choose a prompt that inspires you most. Write. Come back Thursday and paste your blog URL into the Mister Linky that will be up...this way anyone can click on your name and head over to your place to see what you wrote.Feel free to write on more than one prompt if you so desire.

The prompts I have chosen are as follows:

1.) If you could cut back on something in your life that takes up your time what would it be? And what would you prefer to spend that time doing?
I spend WAY to much time online. Msn, facebook, myspace, blogging the list goes on. But damnit, I enjoy it. I love chatting to people from all over the world. I love reading about different places, different people and their lives and the internet lets me do this. I am going to have to limit my time a little because other things that I love are not getting attention. My guitar is dusty, my reading is behind, my shedwork, well don't even get me started... And I need to play more football with my son, and more dolls with my girls. Enough said.

2.) Share a recent adventure you had with a friend.
As I lead such a glamorous, exciting life, I have too many recent adventures to choose from. Joke. I have nothing, so I have chosen a moment in time that I still think about to this day and will probably never recapture again.

During my travels in America, we were in Amarillo, Texas. Our adventure began at the Big Texas Steakhouse where we witnessed our tour manager try out the 72 ounce steak, whilst sitting atop a platform on display. I still can't remember if he succeeded, so maybe the meal cost him $72.00 afterall. The gift shop had a display of rattlesnakes in the glass cabinet. Thrilling stuff.

We then went on to a fantastic nightclub, bar, cowboy poke, who really knows, called the Midnight Rodeo. Our tour group walked in and obviously looked like out of towners as the "locals" came up and welcomed us in. There was a huge dancefloor with cowboys and girls giddyuping around, and a bar in the middle of this area. We sat and drank cinnamon shots in between dancing and riding the mechanical bull in the corner. The cowboys wore hats and spurs, the music was countryish and the night rocked.

The most amazing part of the night was the ride back to our hotel. There was about 10 of us who each paid two cowboys one dollar to drive us back in their pickup truck. We crammed in the back, the wind in our hair, driving down the highway singing:- "the stars at night, are big and bright.... deep in the heart of Texas..." This was adventurous and slightly dangerous because:-

1. We could have caught a cold, it was freezing..
2. We could have been pulled over by the highway patrol, we were speeding.
3. We could have crashed, above reason.
4. We were wasted, we could have fallen out of the back of the truck!
5. We could have seriously flirted with one of the hot guys! See dangerous!

I will never forget this night. Fun, exciting, dangerous, we had no worries in the world. Just freedom and a big headache in the bus the next morning...

3.) Describe a memorable gift. Why was it important to you?
For Mothers Day, my 6 year old son bought me this spoon rest. He said he noticed that when I am cooking, I put my stirring spoon on the table next to the microwave and it leaves a mark, so he thought this would be perfect to rest my spoon on. I was blown away by his thoughtfulness and insight, and besides the fact it is so big, it could be used by a giant to rest his spoon on, I adore it. My son also said I could use it as a soap holder if I like. This gift means more to me than any bling I could think of.


4.) If you could change career paths now and be anything you wanted to be...what would you be and why?
That is so easy. I would love to get into Travel and Tourism. I almost crave it. I will have to work part time next year, to pay for the faceless house we are (not) building, and I would love to work in this industry. Trouble is, with the economic (blah blah) climate at present, this industry could possibly be going nowhere. Do I pay the thousands of dollars and do the certificate in travel that is required, only to not find a job? Or do I just walk into The Flight Centre, who apparently like to hire people with no experience? I think I may just do that..

Pic of the Day

I'm over my little dummy spit of yesterday. Got it all out, I can breathe a little easier now. Went to the school sports carnival this morning, and watched my kids do their sprints. I love my children and I am so proud of them. Which perfect bush did I pluck these kids from?

Here is a recent sunset, which makes me appreciate where we live and what we will have in the future. If only I can learn to live with my impatience, all will be good.