As we come to the end of a very busy first school term, and sit on the edge of a most welcome 12 days holiday Easter break, I feel I have to write this post which has been in the back of my mind for a while.
I'm tired of rushing.
Of feeling stressed. Of not being able to enjoy the little things because I have to be somewhere or I have to be doing something.
I'm a busy mum. I have three children. I work part time. The kids have after school activities. We are building a house. Ourselves. We have our farm. I'm supposed to be exercising........
Something has got to give.
I remember last week, when we arrived home just on sunset. I commented to my daughter how lovely it would be to sit on the front steps of the house (or The Money Pit as we like to call it) and watch this amazing sight.
The little things. We didn't watch the sunset because we had to rush to do something. Or to be somewhere.
And I find that very sad.
If I peel back the layers of my life and sit and observe..I see a mum who is rushing around...with kids doing homework in the car....a mum who is staying up way too late just because she has the stillness of the night....
I know I am not the only one who feels this way. As a good friend recently commented " I feel like I am putting bandaids on all parts of my life". This is how it is for me.
My time management skills are lacking so the things that I NEED to do for me, just don't get done.
My guitar has dust on it.
I haven't scrapbooked for.....?
My new sewing machine still sits in its box.
And it's not only about me.....as a family I can't remember the last time we played tennis, and we always played together at least once a week.
When do I sit on the floor and build with Lego with the kids?
It's not acceptable.
But it's life.
There will be some changes soon....a few less activities....and just some chill out time at home.
I need to discipline myself to go to bed at a reasonable time and get some sleep.
I am really looking forward to the Easter Holidays. To spend time with the kids at the movies, at the Magical Gardens (the Botanical Gardens - our favourite place) and with a picnic or two thrown in.
And to sit on the steps of our unfinished house and watch the sunset.